The woman on the phone is telling me the doctors’ bill is separate from the hospital bill, for the third time, we’re not the ones you sent the financial aid applications to. No, sir, I cannot transfer you to another company. No, I do not have their number.
I am stuck in a traffic circle’s inside lane, and nobody is letting me get over so I can stop circling. I am buying my groceries at a corner-store because Kroger keeps telling me their super-markets are staffed by my friendly neighbors who care. I am supine in a field during a thunderstorm.
I am being told that I do not understand that Ohio State University does not own my debt, nor does the Department of Education, sir, you need to get in touch with the debt-collection agency that has purchased your debt.
I am at the carnival and the politicians have arrived for their speeches. Britain left the EU because racists are taking over. I am eating wild onions from the Ferris wheel’s overgrown lot because these are the only produce not treated with caustic pesticides. I think about drinking water from the pond to escape wondering why the government cares so much about my teeth, but on fourth thought the pond is definitely artificially green because it’s also a great idea to dump copper into water, for aesthetics.
I am being told I don’t understand. My professor is smug and telling me I don’t understand and the Young Republicans are snickering. The liberal in the Lexus, with the Hillary sticker, is visibly pissed at me for confusing his blinker with the intention of turning.
I am being told I don’t understand how the world works. I am told I need to finish my degree. I am told I need to stop drinking. Why have you moved five times in that many years? Don’t you want some stability? You need a job. You need health insurance.
I have submerged myself and I am holding my head under water with both hands. There is a taste of paper-clips in my mouth. I am holding my head under green water and every time I give up the Ferris wheel is still there, and the only thing I can’t understand is why everybody thinks these things are understandable.